Tuesday, May 13, 2008

I feel so blessed. I'm finally a real art teacher! I only sub about once a week and that will be over come summer. I've become quite fan of children's art.

I have a new "little sister" and we have so much fun together. On Saturday we went rock climbing and then walked around the university. After years and years of working with kids, it's so special to have one particular friend to hang out with.

I've had a complete change of heart recently. Or maybe just a renewal of what once was. I'd gotten so sick of the type of person my business was turning me into. It's so hard to explain, but I'd started obsessing over decisions and money. I've been terrified to make bad decisions (and I've made a lot of them). I'd also gotten very prideful. Somehow a switched was flipped, and none of that is important to me anymore. Maybe it's just easier to trust God now that things are going well, but I hope there's more to it than that. I'm learning to be grateful each day for what is, not what could be or should be. I've started to see God as jealous of his role as provider in my life. I used to think of God as my safety net. There when my strength, or finances or hope ran out. Now I see Him as my only source. This is His story. He is the one who is at work. It's His battle, it's His heart that breaks for His world. It is God himself who will call us, build us together, and show us the way to go. I know that should be obvious, but I'm not sure I completely understand it even now.

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